Need help with Models

I dunno if this is the right spot to post in. My mind and right arm abit numb from beating the crud out of various inanimate object due to imense frusteration.

I desperately need someone who will, A) make fairly simple models and texturing for me free of charge, B) walk me through slowly step by step how to do more extensive modelling, texturing, and importing/exporting using GMax, or C) give/show me the download for an idiot-proof modelling program and leave me to my own devices until I lose my patience and then help me with A or B.

I've been trying to figure out how to do modelling several times over now. Either I have no idea what I'm doing, the tutorials I've found don't deserve to take up such precious time in making and reading, or a combination of the two. Please take pity on me and help me an any way possible. Thank you greatly.

//moved

Try whitehorns box modelling tutorial found on this site, its quite helpfull.

If you want help, you will have to motivate poeple a little more. Nowhere in your post do you mention what models and textures you want, where they are going to be used.

It would also be adviced that, if you seriously want to get into modelling for war3, you get 3d studio max 5 somewhere. There are some floating around the web i suppose, but i have no idea where.

I can't really say what models and/or textures I want because I don't know yet, also I've got quite an inadequite source of income and thus not willing to actually buy 3DSM 5. Also I seem incapable of being able to find Whitehorns box modelling tutorial. I looked up 'box modelling' by Whitehorn, and 'tutorial' by Whitehorn, and still no luck.

yes i see now, i cant find them either...

I suppose you could try these:
http://www.wc3campaigns.net/showthread.php?t=76038
video tuts, but atm the links are not working (for my anyway)
and that guy uses a verry diffrent moddeling tech then i do.

I found whitehorn's box modeling tutorial at the hubb.

http://www.fulgrim.com/hubb/index.php/topic,1619.0.html